A friends with benefits deal isn’t for everybody but it does work for some people. Simply put, this arrangement involves having a sexual relationship without dating and any promises of exclusivity.
Some women who go for the friends with benefits deal may do so to get over a break-up or maybe keep from bed-hopping while in between relationships. So how do you do this successfully without things getting complicated? Follow these rules:
1. Choose wisely
When picking a guy for a ‘friends with benefits’ adventure, go for a single, mature guy that can give you what you need. You may want to avoid someone you already have a crush on as having sex with them will only leave you feeling hopeful for something more.
(Photo: Yours Truly Portraiture)
2. Have a time-frame in mind
Go into this with a time-frame in mind. This is not something you do indefinitely. You and the guy should discuss what this is and how long it will last. You don’t want to be in the ‘friends with benefits’ mode while he is already looking to get out and have a real relationship with someone – or vice versa.
3. Handle jealous feelings
Not everyone can have sex with someone and be completely detached emotionally. So, if you start to feel jealous about him hanging out with other girls, it may be time for you to inform him and step out of the arrangement.
4. Monitor relationship-like behavior
There are situations where the guy may be the one catching feelings. So monitor the signs that this is happening such as him wanting to go on dates, calling you daily, inviting you to family-related outings like weddings and so on. If this is happening, it may be time to pull the plug on the whole thing.
(Photo: Pinterest)
5. What if you do fall for him
A lot of friends with benefits deal has become a starting point for a real relationship. So if you’re falling for him, tell him about it. He either says he feels the same or not. Either way, you know your next steps without spending any more time in angst and confusion.
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